Title>Still Waters Run Deep

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Well it’s my Mom’s birthday today and I’ve spent the whole day trying to decide whether I should call or not, in the end I decided not to. It’s been too long and I really think that if she wanted to be in touch with me, she would have called by now. It’s a shame because I miss my family but then I also cannot forgive them for the way they treated me and Bob when they found out that he had been in prison. I wish they weren’t so judgmental and had given me a chance to explain what he had done, and then they would see he never set out to hurt anyone and would never have done so intentionally.

My mother was always a Christian woman as well which makes it even more hypocritical because she’s supposed to be all about forgiveness and repenting for sins. I’ve never been heavy into the traditional forms of religion and maybe that’s why I can be a bit less judgmental about the flaws of human nature and the fact that people just make mistakes sometimes. I don’t even know where my sister lives now, after I moved away with Bob, we lost touch and I heard that she moved too so now I have no idea where she is and she has no idea where I am. Oh well, her loss. I do miss that I don’t get to play aunty though.

I’m also feeling a little down today because I saw the cute guy again yesterday evening when I was out for run. He was running towards me and I decided there and then that I would say hi and give him a smile; so when he got closer I looked him in the eye and gave him a warm smile and said “hi”. He slowed right down and said hi too, and I really felt like he was happy to see me. As he got level with me I looked down and saw that he was wearing a wedding ring and I just felt crushed. I guess I’d hoped in my mind that he might be interested in me and that things might progress but who am I kidding? He probably thought that he might be able to get away with having a quick fling with me because he was clearly checking me out and flirting, but I don’t want to get involved with someone who’s married so I’ll steer clear of him in future.
Oh well, back to adult friend finder! I think I’ll treat myself to a big bar of chocolate today as it’s Easter. Happy Bunny day!

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